Fear of water in children: Why they swim in pools but fear the sea?

5 hours ago
4 min read

Every year, whenever I get the chance, I love taking kids – my own and the swimmers I coach – out of the swimming pool and into open water: rivers, lakes, or the sea. Why? Because children who swim only in pools often freeze up when they have to “jump” into the sea with waves and an unpredictable bottom. They forget to breathe, forget how to swim. Sounds strange, but it’s true.

I’ve already written about why kids are afraid to swim in the sea. This time, I want to share stories from my swimmers who were confident in the pool but terrified of the open water – and how we overcame those fears together. The most important part? Keeping kids safe in and around the water.

I Don’t know how to breathe in the sea!

Maja was nine and had been swimming since she was three. She and her sisters swam twice a week, year-round. Every summer, though, when she visited her grandmother at the seaside, she never swam – she barely even got in. Her sisters told me she would only dip her toes in the water.

When I asked why she didn’t swim in the sea, she just smiled and shrugged. I wanted to help her enjoy swimming with her sisters that summer, so I organized a family beach picnic and water games.

Everyone was having fun, but when it was time to swim in the sea and race “kids vs parents,” Maja stepped in up to her knees, burst into tears, and repeated: “I can’t breathe!”

I knelt beside her, took her hand, and sat with her in the shallows. We started taking slow, deep breaths together. When she calmed down, she told me she was scared that if a wave splashed her face, she wouldn’t be able to lift her head to breathe.

For the next 30 minutes, we sat in the shallows waiting for waves to splash us – laughing and breathing correctly every time. After that, we went a bit deeper, kneeling in waist-deep water, and repeated the same game. After a series of “salty slaps” and lots of giggles, she finally said: “Can we go swim now?” We swam out together – and from that summer on, Maja swam happily every time she visited her grandmother.

Tip: When kids learn to breathe correctly in water, they can swim anywhere – pool, lake, or sea. And if they forget, gently remind them: How to breathe and swim properly?

Why it’s important to swim in rivers, lakes, and seas too

Sometimes kids who are great swimmers in the pool – even those living by the coast – never swim in open water until they’re 10 or 11. That’s why it’s crucial to expose them to different types of water early. Each has its own rhythm, temperature, and challenges.

When they understand that, they’ll become more confident swimmers and safer around all kinds of water.

I’m afraid to dive in the sea - fear of water in children

Marko, six, had been coming to my classes twice a week for two years. He loved diving in the pool, solving underwater “obstacle courses” I set up for the kids. But last summer, his mom came to me worried – Marko refused to dive in the sea. Nothing bad had happened. He simply felt tense in the open water. The endless blue below made him uneasy.

This is common. Kids who are fearless divers in the pool can freeze up in the sea because they can’t see what’s “down there.”

My advice to his mom: makes it an adventure. Put on masks together, explore the shallow seabed, collect shells and pebbles, and gradually go deeper.

Within a few days, Marko was relaxed, diving just like he did in the pool – only now, discovering the wonders of the sea.

Overcoming fear takes time – and patience

Fear of water in children doesn’t disappear overnight. Some kids relax in a single session, others need weeks or months. The key is not to rush them.

Here’s what’s worked for me in 3- decades of teaching:

· Let kids watch first – see others playing in the water.

· Create a relaxed atmosphere on shore and in the water.

· Bring their favorite toys to make water play fun.

· Get in the water with them – be their safe anchor.

· Learn to read their body language – the tight grip of their hand says it all.

My son’s story

My own son, Jakov, has been in the water since he was four months old. He loves both pool and open water swimming. Yet, for a while, he wouldn’t swim past the buoys or dive deep unless I was right next to him.

Nothing traumatic happened – maybe he overheard adults talking about “sea monsters,” maybe it was just a phase. But I knew one thing: he loved treasure hunts.

So, I turned it into a family treasure hunt. The “treasure” was hidden right by the buoy. Together – mom, Jakov, and his younger sister – we swam out, rested, took a deep breath, and explored around the buoy, discovering shells and seaweed stuck to it.

Today, at ten, he dives fearlessly into open water – though I always keep him in sight and within arm’s reach.

Turning “competitions” into games

A few summers ago, my two kids – “the little shark” and “the little fish” – wanted to join the family’s annual open-water swim. They were only five and six at the time. As a coach, I knew they were ready. As a dad, I worried.

The word “race” made my daughter anxious, so I replaced it with “game” – a playful chase through the waves with friends. Suddenly, her fear vanished.

We swam 200 meters at our own pace. It wasn’t easy – even for experienced swimmers, open water and waves can be tough. But the smiles on their faces afterward were priceless.

Life is better when you swim

Some children conquer their fear of water in a day. Others take weeks, months, even years. What matters is not giving up.

Help them turn fear into curiosity, and swimming will become one of the greatest joys of their childhood – wherever the water may be, because - Life Is Beter When You're Swimming!